Every day, more and more women are transitioning from relaxed to their natural hair; and we can’t help but notice. Obviously, everyone has their own reasons. Michelle shares hers whilst she prepares for the big chop.
Define what makes you beautiful!
As I spend more time with women from all different walks of life, I have come to the conclusion that what makes us different is in fact what makes us beautiful.
This is something I tell my daughter. I want her to believe that what she sees in the mirror staring back at her is her God-given beauty and she needs to embrace and own it.
Being an impressionable young girl, it breaks my heart that she thinks beauty means straight hair. I get it, I remember being her age and pleading with my mum to let me have my hair relaxed. I told my mum not only would it be manageable it meant I could be responsible for looking after it blah blah blah.
Deep down the real reason for me wanting to have my hair relaxed was so I would fit in with my peers. I admired how they looked and wanted to be accepted into that world so I would feel “pretty”.
I was already the odd one out being 5’7 at age 10 and towering over everyone else. After months of discussions with my mum, finally, she agreed to me having my hair relaxed.
To this day I don’t know what made her change her mind, I was just super grateful that she had given me the green light.
Leading by example
After over 2 decades of getting my hair chemically straightened every 6-8 weeks, I don’t even remember what my natural hair was like. It sounds stupid I know, and it actually makes me a little sad.
Here I am trying to be a role model to my daughter, encouraging her to embrace all that she has, while I continue to book my hair appointments; continuing to change a fundamental part of me.
While I firmly believe that your hair does not define your beauty, it got me thinking. The majority of my school girlfriends have all gone back to having natural hair, each for their own personal reasons.
I thought, should I buck this growing movement and carry on as I have been doing or do I just take my own advice and lead by example? As as a mum, I can admit that we don’t always get it right. Children don’t come with a manual, but you do the best you can every day to parent the s*** out of life.
The Big Chop
So here I am, having made the grown woman decision to finally let go of my relaxed hair. My hairdresser has informed me that it will all need to be cut off, there was possible talk of it being shaved too.
Some may think I’m mad, others may say I’m ballsy. Having natural short hair doesn’t bother me in the slightest, it’s hair, and it will continue to grow and do its thing.
Selfishly the thing that makes me happy about all of this is not only the lesson I’m teaching my child, especially as she’ll be right by my side when I go for the big chop! I’ll also be donating all of my hair to the Little Princess Trust.
Beauty is about being comfortable in your own skin. It’s genuinely knowing and accepting who you are.
Author Bio
Michelle is a mother of two who believes in honest parenting. She has a creative background in fashion, which has led her to a career in the jewellery industry buying & marketing. Follow her story on Instagram.
*All thoughts and opinions remain the authors own and do not necessarily reflect the sentiments of Sareta Fontaine.
Thinking about going for the big chop or on the lookout for some natural hair inspo? Take a look at my ‘Natural Hair’ Pinterest board for the most beautiful styles.
Welcome to the club! You’ll get to know your hair soon enough, you’ll realise how versatile it is! – You can go from straight to ALL DIFFERENT CURL SHAPES AND SIZES! Honestly, you’ll love it x
Wish I would’ve done it sooner to be honest!! It feels so different, but I guess I just need to give it time to grow and go back to how it was xx
I love it!!! AHMAHGAAAAAAAD YOU LOOK FABULOUS MICHELLE! And amen! I bet your daughter is proud to have a mama like you x
Awwww thank-you my lovely. It’s so funny, she’s already said to me that she doesn’t want to have her hair relaxed anymore. And she’s doing everything to define her natural curls. This has massively been a game changer xx
Well this is just gosh darn amazing!!! Best decision for so many reasons, you look incredible.
Thank-you Hayley, by far it’s been the best decision I’ve made!! I feel really good about it xx
It’s the best thing I did! I had no idea what my real hair was like either and even now I’m still finding out. Although, I wasn’t brave enough to do a big chop, just big ish chops over time. 5 years relaxer free this year ?
That’s amazing Lara,
Five years is mega!!! I commend your decision to go natural. I would always say to anyone wanting to go natural to do it on your own terms and do what you feel comfortable with in order to grow it out x
Looks amazing!! Great read x
Thank-you Karen,
So pleased you’ve enjoyed reading the post too. I feel like it is a topic that needs to be highlighted x
Michelle! You KNOW I love it! So proud of you!! You are gorgeous xxx
Cee!!
I held it together sat in that chair. Thank-you my darling. It’s the BEST decision I’ve made this year. And it’s already been a game changer as my daughter no longer wants her hair relaxing!! I’m elated and one very happy mama right now xxx
You are beautiful and this big chop is gorgeous! You are setting a lovely example x
Thank-you Tamu,
All I wanted is for my daughter to embrace who she is. She absolutely loves the fact I’ve cut it off and that she can now see me with my natural hair x